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The first 10 years of training are hard, the next ten years even harder. And after that it starts to become joyful...
Harada Roshi

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I practice meditation for about four years now. I try to focus on my breath. Still I have the feeling I cannot sit for a long time about 15 Minutes each time. I always wait for the bell on my phone to ring. Even tho I look the whole day forward to the time I could sit I'm always happy when it's over. When I sit I just wait for the bell to ring. What can I do to overcome the restless waiting for the end of the meditation?

 This is a very honest question. You dug your own trap and have fallen into it. Maybe you thought setting a timer would let you be more relaxed and at ease. But if it is you who set up the timer, of course you would be aware of the timer ringing soon.

The more you get used to sitting, your body becomes the timer. That also is a problem, because then we stop sitting when our body is coming to its limit.

Any zazen that is limited by time is not true zazen because sitting is about forgetting time. In order to be able to forget time, we need to make continuous efforts to go beyond the limits we face.

People who work will be happy to sit their daily zazen. That also is a way of going about it. That set time for zazen gives a balance to our body and mind.

We need to go through many experiences and naturally our zazen deepens. Please do not stop at those small challenges, but feed your mind daily.

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