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Our source of awareness is prior to picking and choosing...
Harada Roshi

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I sat Rohatsu Sesshin in the U.S. this year. On the 4th day I had a psychedelic like experience which eventually caused strong anxiety and panic. I had a milder experience without the anxiety at my first sesshin earlier this year. Is this normal or am I merely inducing psychosis?

Our consciousness moves according to circumstance, and we are used to being able to match these. This is our superficial perception. Like the wind touching the water is creating waves. Yet when we sit zazen and this superficial consciousness quietens, the subconscious appears. So whatever you experience then is what has been stored in your subconsciousness. there is so much information on past memories and experiences stored there. There is no evil or buddha there, only past memories. Do not be scared but rather settled your breathing and keep purifying, letting go, moving in, and finally these memories will fade. If you pay attention to them, you will get confused. In zazen we purify our consciousness and then our subconsciousness. It is purification of mind.

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